![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
Entry tags:
TDM 009: I'M IN LIKE WITH YOU
| TDM 009: I'M IN LIKE WITH YOU |
00. Arrival This time, you come out of the water, the Nameless Island's own inherent energy drawing people in. It's like being suspended between realities and abruptly pushed from behind through a rift in dimensions. It may make you sick, or that might be the motion of the ocean, lifting you to the surface and carrying you to shore. Waterlogged and covered in sand, new arrivals will be greeted by robots who welcome them with towels and bracelet devices. The A5 card is already loaded up. Feel free to explore the Island, though there isn’t much to see. Most of the buildings are abandoned and in dire need of repair, and beyond the city lingers a thick fog that obscures much of the wilderness from view. Wander too far into this fog, and you will find yourself mysteriously looping back to where you began, your memories of what you were doing and how you got there erased. With that in mind, it may be wise to stake your claim on a rundown apartment, a tent on the beach, or a bed in the “comfortable” new barracks. Your inventory will be found a day later, wrapped up haphazardly and delivered to each person's makeshift home. I. STARGAZER On the first night that new arrivals wash ashore, the moon rises. It's full and beautiful and surrounded by stars. The robots quickly bring old, dusty telescopes out of storage and line them up on the beach to help people get a truly spectacular view. "Look to the heavens! Behold, the chicken, the cat, the owl, the donkey!" It's... the cock, the pussy, the hooters, and the ass. For the rest of the night, characters will become fixated on the specific asset associated with the constellation they've gotten an eyeful of. Whether this leads to some body worship or just casual appreciation is up to you. You can learn about the stars and constellations later this month in some of the rare, non-pornographic books in the library. (More info will go up soon, so please be patient!) II. STIMULATING CONVERSATION An ancient courting ritual has been announced! It involves the give-and-take of candy hearts with slogans printed on them. Of course, since these hearts are being manufactured by robots, their sense of taste is a little... off? Or perhaps off-putting? "You'll do." "5/10." "Acceptable." "Sloppy Seconds." Receiving a negative heart makes one feel insecure, jealous, and submissive. "Be mine." "Nicest ass." "Swell bulge." "They're good lays, Bront." Receiving a positive heart will make one feel confident, boastful, and dominant. Your friendly neighborhood 'bots will give them out to anyone who asks - and maybe even those who don't. III. Eat Or Dare The robots have set up a stall by the beach with a banner that reads: Eat Or Dare. They have procured bigger candy hearts than ever before -- fist-sized and larger -- with actions written on them instead of derogatory slogans. "Take a dive." "Lick me." "Get handsy." The name of the game is to follow the instructions or forfeit the challenge by making the evidence disappear into your mouth. Delicious! Those who eat the candy hearts will feel themselves getting giddy and unreasonably invested in the love affairs of others. They will feel compelled to play matchmaker to spread the cheer. N A V I G A T I O N |
Linhardt von Hevring | Fire Emblem 3 Houses | OTA
Arrival:
[ Huh. This is certainly not where Linhardt seems to be. That said, aside from being annoying waterlogged, he can’t find anything that bothersome about the situation either. Still, he resents the swim back to shore.
To his relief, the robots on the shore seem to be more interested in helping him than murdering him horribly, so this is already going better than it could have. Linhardt has no reason not to take the towel, though why you would waste that amount of magical energy powering something to hand out towels is beyond him.
What is this bracelet thing anyway? He holds it up and examines it, but it doesn’t give much away. Some of the protrusions are clearly buttons, but he doesn’t know what they do. A small gust of wind makes him shiver. Right. Maybe focus on that first.
There didn’t seem to be anyone else on the beach at the moment.
Linhardt searches around for a nearby rock with a large, flat surface, then begins unceremoniously shedding his clothing, arranging it so that it dries quickly. Right. The clothes are taken care of. Not a good idea to leave them, though.
In lieu of having anything better to do (or rather, in lieu of having a desire to do anything else), Linhardt joins his clothes, stretching himself out on the rock to feel the sun dance across his face, the salt spray in the ear, the whisperings of the wildlife, the…
Giant shadow in his sunline? ]
It’s very rude to stand in someone’s sun.
Constellations
[ The most interesting thing about the constellations here is that none of them make sense. The stars aren’t just in the wrong places- Linhardt can’t even recognize them. They’re still just as beautiful, though. He tilts the contraption, pointing it up at the sky, and then looks through the glass.
Oh. Oh, this is beautiful. Linhardt had no idea there were so many stars anywhere in the world. He loses himself for a few minutes, but he eventually remembers what the automaton was saying about constellations. Yes. He should look at those.
What was that one? He turns the telescope around. Ah! The donkey! Strange animal for a constellation, if you asked Linhardt. Which nobody did.
Alas, even the beauty of the stars can’t keep him captivated forever, and Linhardt thinks to himself that he sort of wants to go back to the party. Well. Where did that come from? Interesting. Still, he isn’t one to deny himself something he wants or is curious about, so he folds up the telescope and stashes it behind some other things. Hopefully nobody will notice if he swipes one.
The feeling of captivation doesn’t lessen as he steps back into the group, instead, it’s focused… somewhere else. How could he not have seen it? How unique people were! How unique their body parts were! At first, he walks around just looking at others, but then he finds something extraordinary: A pair of ass-twins. They have the same ass. They do. But they’re different people. Within five minutes, Linhardt produces a notebook as well as a crude ass-categorization sheet.
Still, some people aren’t cooperating. Either they’re hiding their derrieres or they’re just not letting him see them in proper lighting. Linhardt taps one such person on the shoulder, not caring that he might be interrupting a conversation. ]
Excuse me. Can you move into the light, please? I need a better look at you.
[Linhardt pauses.]
Thank you.
Giant Candy Hearts
Well, this is just ambiguous.
[ Linhardt holds the giant heart-shaped candy in front of him and turns to whomever is standing next to him, gesturing at the sweet. ]
It says ‘Lick Me’. Does it mean the person has to lick the candy or the person giving it to them? Those are rather different activities.
[ He cups his chin and considers the giant block of chalk-like candy. ]
What does yours say?
[ The more examples he has to examine, the more likely it is he can find out what’s going on. Linhardt looks back at the candy heart pile.]
I wonder if there are any instructing someone to sleep. I could use that one.
arrival
And more than that, he recognized that ability to fall asleep anywhere. ]
Linhardt! While I applaud the prudent decision to allow your clothes to dry, this is hardly the ideal place for you to fall asleep.
[ Yes, even after several months on sex island, Ferdinand is still concerned with things like propriety and modesty. But it's not just that. ]
That being said, it is good to see you... [ But before he can allow himself a smile, he places a hand to his forehead, rubbing it in exasperation. ] ...Even if the circumstances are far from ideal.
Re: arrival
On the contrary. I'm in an unknown location. Exploring without being properly rested and prepared would have been even less prudent. But if you know of somewhere more suitable, by all means lead me.
[ The prospect of an actual bed, with an actual pillow, moves Linhardt into a standing position. He gathers his clothes up in his arms and pauses, cocking his head to the side slightly.]
Why would you say that?
[Linhardt much prefers being on an unidentified island to fighting in a war.]
no subject
It is... distasteful, but we are expected by our hosts to perform certain obligations. And those obligations involve...
[ Ah, how does he put this? One thing that he and Linhardt both have in common is a distaste for crassness, even if they take wildly different approaches to life in other ways. ]
Well, for lack of a better term, physical intimacy. This entire island seems to thrive on the energy released by it. If you would like, I can take you to the building that Her Majesty and I have turned into a dormitory of sorts.
[ It's a repurposed love hotel. Ferdinand and Edelgard fixed up a run-down love hotel and have been living in it for months now. ]
no subject
Emperor Edelgard is here?
[Lindhart groans and shakes his head.]
And here I was hoping I would get a rest.
I don't find the obligations any worse than the things I've already done.
[It's telling of how much Linhardt despises war and battle that he finds these inappropriate requests more palatable than his daily existence in the army.]
If Edelgard is here, I presume she has a goal of some sort.
[Edelgard without her drive isn't Edelgard, after all.]
no subject
Still, that's no way to respond to the realization that one's Emperor is trapped on a strange sex island with them. ]
Her only goal, at least that she has shared with me, is to figure out how to get back home.
[ He holds out an arm, gesturing toward Linhardt's clothing. He would be more than happy to carry it for him. ]
You need not worry about fighting, Linhardt. The Kingdom, the Alliance, the Empire, and even those from the Church of Seiros are all in agreement: there is no point in continuing hostilities here.
[ Not that everyone gets along. Ferdinand gets along with everybody, even the people who claim to have killed him, but that's because he's Ferdinand. ]
It would accomplish nothing, anyway. It would seem all of us were taken from different points in time. For myself, the war has been over for a few days now, while for others, it is still going. It is all very confusing to me.
no subject
[Of course not. Why does he even ask? Linhardt does gladly accept the offer to have his stuff carried, feeling no shame whatsoever as he shoves the wet cloth in Ferdinand's direction. Ugh. Carrying that was so unpleasant.]
Others? There are others here? This is fantastic news!
[Linhardt graces Ferdinand with a smile, one that reaches his eyes, and he actually picks up his pace.]
Which Crests are here?
[Because of course that's Linhardt's question. To Linhardt, it seems like paradise. Crests from all across Fodlan and he can talk to them and nobody is trying to kill each other? His smile widens and Linhardt lets out a tension he isn't even aware he holds in himself. Linhardt looks... happy.]
Are there any Relics here? If so, which ones?
[And of course, Ferdinand, Edelgard, and Hubert were going to be busy finding ways to return home and extract useful information from their temporary allies, so he was even going to have time.]
Ferdinand, this is fantastic!
[Speaking of time... they were there from different times? Linhardt can somewhat understand how he was brought here: He can teleport people. Of course, the distances and energies involved are far beyond anything he could manage but the idea is the same. Time is entirely different, however. Still, he had wondered...]
I'd wondered about that. You know that the sun rises on the eastern coast of Fodlan before the western coast? If someone were Warped from the eastern coast after sunrise to the western coast before sunrise, that would be similar, wouldn't it? Of course, nobody can cast over that great a distance, but it would make sense.
[Be careful what you wish for, Ferdinand. Congratulations, Linhardt is actually engaging.]
no subject
A-Ah... where to even begin? Let's start with the individuals who are here.
[ He rubs his forehead. He hasn't seen Linhardt in some time now. He'd almost forgotten how motivated by knowledge the young man is. ]
Her Majesty Edelgard and King Dimitri are both here. Believe it or not, they are... not at one another's throats. Claude was here as well, but he has since disappeared. Flayn and Seteth are also here, as are Constance, Lorenz, Annette, Mercedes, and Hilda. Ah, and I heard that Ashe is here as well.
[ There have been others, but some of them he's not seen in some time... a thought that saddens him a bit. ]
But the others who are here are not from our world. They come from worlds without Crests. Some have advanced technology, while others have magic that is different from what we know.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
5 years later
Giant Candy Hearts
Mine asks for someone to be pushed into a large body of water.
[ It reads "take a dive," so yes. That's what it means, doesn't it? ]
We should be able to find out if we watch someone who is willing to eat these ostentatious candy hearts.
Wherein Linhardt discovers he does NOT like candy hearts
I don't see what would be so difficult about eating these. They're large, but not inordinately so. I will agree with you that they're rather ostentatious.
[ To prove his point about the hearts being edible, Linhardt raises his to his face and bites into it. A decision he instantly regrets. This is supposed to be candy, but it has a texture like a rock. Lindhart's face contorts into an agonized expression as he swallows. ]
Do not eat this. Oh, that is vile. I would much rather be pushed into the ocean than ever put this near my mouth again.
:C but it's candy
[ Oh no, he ate it. How will she explain this to Edelgard? "I'm sorry, your highness, your bishop has been poisoned on my watch. Please do not execute me?" ]
I had no plans to eat this. [ Except she did, she absolutely did. It's candy. And it's new. But now that that's clear and the inevitable has happened...
... is it research time? ]
How do you feel? Do you find yourself having strange urges?
It's always research time
It's not immediately poisonous, just repulsive.
[Honestly, learning that a.) Linhardt was present and b.) Linhardt poisoned himself to learn something wouldn't surprise Edelgard in the least.
Hmm. Strange urges. Linhardt holds his chin and thinks.]
Yes, actually. I feel a strong desire to lick you, which is rather disgusting.
[He shoves his heart at Constance and places two of his fingers on his throat, feeling for his pulse.]
My pulse is also quicker than usual and I feel warm. I'm also experiencing a higher than usual awareness of your physical attributes.
no subject
I would implore you to refrain from licking me, even if I am absolutely not disgusting, but instead resplendent and beautiful. [ This needs to be stressed, she is not disgusting, how dare you.
That said, Constance has knows that there is one simple, crass word for Linhardt's situation and she would rather not harass another green haired, Saint-crested person for a while. ]
Shall we find someone that you are more amenable to licking?
no subject
You're not disgusting.
[ What an odd leap to make. Constance is quite correct in her assessment of herself, though it seems incomplete. Linhardt wracks his brain, trying to come up with a more complete list of adjectives. Unfortunately, most of the ones that come to mind right now are ones even Linhardt can't say with a straight face. Not all of them, though. ]
You are indeed beautiful and resplendent, though more importantly, you're interesting.
[ Linhardt finds most people attractive, it's interacting with them that's offputting.]
It's the licking itself that's disgusting. I don't consider myself particularly prudish, but I fail to see how licking is an activity that's supposed to engender desire in the receiver.
[ He's had partners before, and while he's indulged requests due to his experimental nature, none of them have ever licked him. ]
For example, I doubt my licking you would change your estimation of my attractiveness in either direction. My oddity, yes. Attractiveness, no. Actually, the same is true of your activity: I wouldn't find you more or less beautiful if you pushed me into the water. I would only make sure I avoided you when you were near water.
no subject
It depends on several factors, including location, body part, partner and mood. [ Says in a matter-of-fact manner, because this is research, not gossip about previous and current intimate partners. ] I do have questions about the supposed preference of certain nobles for bootlicking? That I have never understood.
And rest assured that I have no intention of drowning you or making you dive for anything. [ What kind of kink is diving even? Every day you learn something new in sex island. ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
I'm so sorry, Constance.
never apologize for science
SCIENCE FRIENDS
research associates!
Constance needs to invent lab safety and make Linhardt take that class
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
Constellations
He really must stop thinking like that. He doesn't bother with the telescope, it hardly matters. None of the constellations will be familiar. Lorenz is considering calling Oran and Even to see if they would be interested in coming out to stargaze with him, maybe tell him more about their own constellations. In fact he's so wrapped up in what he's looking at that he actually jumps, startled, at the tap to his shoulder, whirling around and seeming to float for just a moment as he dodges back. It's habit from so many years dodging attacks and, honestly, with a slight shift in his recent wardrobe it is far safer to hover than it is to try anything too ambitious in the tall heels he's come to favor. (Well, others have come to favor on him.]
Wait... Linhardt?! Flames, when did you get here?
Re: Constellations
Ah! It's the shoes!]
Oh, I see, I need a category for wardrobe modifications. Although is that accurate? Maybe the modification list should be separate...
[Which engendered another question.]
If you could remove your shoes, that would be helpful.
[And it was only then, once he's found his answer, that Linhardt actually realizes the other person is saying something. And that they know him. He waves a hand like it's not a very important question.]
Yesterday. Ferdinand interrupted the most wonderful nap. And he made me put my clothes back on.
[Context, Lin. Context. Yeah. He doesn't care how things sound or look at home, why would here be any different?]
no subject
My... shoes?
[And here he's used to people asking him to keep the tall heeled boots on.
Oh but! An answer. Yesterday and he's already stumbled his way into Ferdinand, into scandalizing Ferdinand, no doubt. Especially if he'd been lounging around napping without his clothes. Sothis' sake, Linhardt how have you managed to cause trouble already.]
Well that saves me from needing to take you to Her Majesty. What... are you doing??
no subject
Can you move your hands?
[What is he doing? That isn't a question Linhardt is asked very often. Usually, it's 'stop reading, we're having a war meeting' or 'wake up, I need to discuss a tactical problem with you'.]
I'm trying to classify you- well, a part of you. Your behind wasn't like other people's. It stands out and I was trying to figure out why.
[The man crouches down and takes a better look at the shoes and their elevation.]
But it's the shoes.
[Without thinking anything of it, he reaches out and runs a finger along the side of the shoe to the back and then up the back of Lorenz's calf at the knee, connecting the muscles in his head to build a mental picture of how they change the look of a backside.
At the mention of Edelgard, Linhardt sighs and looks up at Lorenz, his purple eyes slightly annoyed.]
Why is everyone's first thought to bring me to Lady Edelgard? I'm not a stray monastery dog.
no subject
It's not entirely the shoes I'll have you know.
[Implying his ass isn't fantastic because of the work he puts into maintaining his figure is just rude.]
And so far all of the Black Eagles are residing in the same location. With Her Majesty. Just as, as far as I am aware, all of the present Blue Lions are staying with or near Dimitri.
[And he very pointedly says nothing about the Deer... Claude is gone and he doesn't want to have to discuss that... mess. Not with Linhardt, certainly.]
no subject
It isn't, I only noticed because it looked so nic- unusual.
[He corrects himself. Saying that Lorenz's behind looks nice would likely end with a Thoron to his face, and while Linhardt believes in indulging his curiosities regardless of people's opinions, he also believes in not having lightning thrown at his face.]
If it weren't already remarkable, the shoes wouldn't make much of a difference.
[Mention of Dimitri causes Linhardt's eyes to snap up to Lorenz, and he rises from his near-sitting position. Dimitri and Edelgard are here? He has assumed that any truce was between either Claude and Edelgard or Edelgard and the Church. It's hard to imagine the two of them agreeing to a truce.]
Is the situation that dire? That Dimitri and Edelgard have stopped feuding?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
constellations!
Linhardt.
[ Of course she'll step into the light so he can see her better. He must be as surprised to see her as she is to see him. ]
When did you arrive?
[ Despite the twinge of envy she has felt at times toward Dimitri over the fact that so many of his allies are here, she doesn't feel a particular pleasure in seeing Linhardt. This is an odd prison, to say the least, but it is a prison. ]
Re: constellations!
Dying here would defeat the purpose.]
Your Majesty. I'm surprised to see you here. I arrived yesterday afternoon, though I am coming to the distressing realization that time is meaningless.
[No, that isn't the right word, but he can't think of how to explain his thoughts. This is why Linhardt finds people exhausting and having a good half of his brain taken up with thoughts about Edelgard's features isn't helping him in the 'speaking with people' department.]
Where is Hubert?
[Because the idea that Edelgard would be here without him doesn't even occur to Linhardt. Plus, if he can lure the Emperor and Hubert into a conversation, Linhardt can bow out and not have to ever explain that 'perky' was an adjective that arose in regards to Edelgard's... anything.]
no subject
His question, however, is one she has thought before herself. This is the longest she has been without Hubert since they were children. ]
Contrary to popular belief, Hubert is not my literal shadow. So far he has been fortunate enough to escape this place.
[ But let's not linger on Hubert, whose absence has felt increasing tangible to her. ]
Many other familiar faces are here, however, and we have established a temporary truce. I can even offer you a place to stay if you are in need. Ferdinand and I set up in what we believe was once an inn and there are still unoccupied rooms.
no subject
Still, hearing that there's others here and that there's a truce makes Linhardt smile; he's not going to be expected to kill anyone! It's as close as Linhardt gets to beaming.]
Which Crests are here? Are there any Relics?
[Of course that's how he asks. His research is the most important thing. Still, there is one other question on his mind.]
What I don't understand is why you're here. You'd think they'd select people that would be amenable to the situation. My first thought is that they have the energy for the transportation but not the informational logistics to determine who they're kidnapping, but I just can't see that being the case, if only because the teleportation needs to be so exact, and that level of accuracy suggests that our hosts are comfortable with what they're doing, and you need information to accomplish that.
[Typical Lindhart going off on a tangent. At least he's engaging with something relevant.]
I suppose I'll have to assist with helping you return; I don't like that you're in a situation that makes you uncomfortable.
[Interesting choice of pronouns there, Linhardt.]
The energy requirements alone are going to be enormous... and where even is Fodlan relative to here?