TDM 002

[erkumods]

TDM 002: IF FOUND PLEASE RETURN TO

( 1 ) Around mid-morning, a message from the Augur appears on bracelets all across the city. "New organisms discovered. Domestication in progress." The wark of a chocobo rises up from the outskirts of the city. Several more join in, forming a charming chorus. And, strangely, this is when new arrivals begin to show up. Beamed in one at a time, scanned en masse, they are processed just as the first wave was. There's one major difference: whereas the old guard was given their bracelets and ushered into the City, the new folks are also given... collars. Buckled, snapped, or otherwise fastened around their necks, a variety of colorful collars with some rather unusual novelty pet tags. (These are just a few suggestions. The typical “If found, please return to ____” is also very much acceptable.) "You are new organisms. Domestication in progress. Compatible Eros energy will complete domestication." No matter how hard they try, characters cannot take the collars off by themselves. They need a partner's help - but not just anyone will do. It very well might be the first person they find, or it might take several tries. The robots grow bolder as the day grows on, targeting characters who aren't new, as well. "Y̶o̶u̴ ̸a̷r̸e̷ ̵o̵r̵g̶a̴n̷i̷s̶m̸s̶.̶ ̶D̷o̶m̴e̴s̶t̶i̶c̵a̸t̶i̸o̴n̸ ̷i̵n̸ ̴p̸r̶o̵g̷r̵e̷s̵s̷." Their antics die down by nightfall, but for the next day or two, the occasional malfunctioning 'bot may accost someone in the street, so stay on your toes! ( 2 ) An abandoned racetrack lights up the night. That's right: place your bets, folks, because these birds are about to run around a track while robots sell synthetic, overpriced aphro-popcorn. ...Did you say priced? That’s right! If you participated in the orgy earlier this month, you'll find you have a stash of credits accessible in your app. You've fucked money back into the world, so why not waste it? (Opportunities to earn credits will come up periodically and won't always be sexual in nature, so don't worry if your character wouldn't have any yet.) And if you don't have credits to bet with, why not get creative? ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● N A V I G A T I O N

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angelo sauper — mobile suit gundam unicorn

[apodictic]

BIRD TROUBLE.

[ someone doesn’t like birds and is being cornered by it. ]

Okay. That is — [ the bird fluffs its feathers and rears its neck up, in a show of dominance, trying to make itself bigger than angelo. not that that’s difficult, considering angelo’s petite height, but this is ridiculous that he can be shown up by a bird. one that is bigger than what he'd like and smells horrible.

as this isn’t exactly a mobile suit, nor is it a person he can reason with, angelo’s feeling very much put upon, looking at it in disgust. ]

Can’t you just — get away from me. I do not like your feathery brethren.

[ anyway, three more show up in interest. looks like things will get dicey. ]

RACE TRACK.

[ angelo watches all the birds run around and is bored. ]

They should do it gladiator-style, instead.

[ he folds his arms over his chest, a foot tapping in annoyance on the floor as he watches the birds squabble around on the track. ]

What a waste. This thing can probably feed a family of five with leftovers for the next day.

WILDCARD.

[ no nsfw option for angelo this time around, but we can talk it over. relevant info needed for nsfw things in his journal! ]

birb 💃

[smoulder]

[ the four birds cant their heads and stare at angelo unblinkingly, curious, perhaps even wondering among themselves if angelo would make a savory or sweet treat (most likely: bitter) but before any of them could take another step, there is a loud crackling from behind, and a sudden burst of flame erupts that climbs taller than even the tallest of the birds can reach. they scatter, predictably, quickly leaving behind nothing but angelo in his corner and a cloud of dust that soon clears out to reveal— ]

Oh — Lieutenant.

[ mako pauses, glancing around. don't mind him, he's just a little thrown off considering... he was fully expecting to see some helpless civilian cowering in the corner there, not...

uh. anyway. ]

Are you alright?

[apodictic]

I am not.

[ a glare! which is how angelo looks like when he's not in the company of someone he likes. which is often. and right now these birds are testing his patience, which is admittedly .... very short. ]

I'm glad you distracted them. [ angelo brushes off feathers and dust from his uniform fastidiously. ] While I'm completely fine advocating for their untimely deaths, I'm not going to be cruel and destroy them beak by beak.

[ a sigh. ] If they can be proven of use perhaps it'd be a different story. But for animals like these -- if they are to be ridden, like how some people are using them, then that means their meat is overly tough.

Have you seen anything so ridiculous? [ a disdainful look at another one meandering on the street. ] So fluffy.

[ sorry we didn't get this shit in the colonies. angelo's just thinking of how best to pragmatically estimate their use. ]

[smoulder]

[ mako doesn't make a move to help the other man straighten out or anything like that, but he stands ready in case any of the other birds decide to wander closer... though this time he's not really sure for whose safety his intervention would be for. ]

At the very least, if they're edible, they'll make fine jerky.

[ but also... meat is meat. mako's never been overly picky to begin with. ]

They remind me a little bit of the ostrich horses around the Earth Kingdom but... definitely fluffier, yeah.

[apodictic]

You have such creatures too? What a menace they are. I've been fortunate to have been exposed to any.

[ in the colonies there is only ... dis pear. ]

I suppose they haven't been bothering you. Are you good with animals at all?

[smoulder]

Uh, I wouldn't say so... My brother's always been better with them than me, but these guys don't seem to really bother you if you don't give them a reason to.

[ he pauses, realizing he'd just indirectly insulted the man. ]

...Of course there are always exceptions. Sir.

[apodictic]

[ he just narrows his eyes at him. he's onto you .... ]

They're not native here.

[ a pause. ] The robots themselves were screeching something about domesticating such things.

[smoulder]

Well no wonder they're spooked.

[ he spares the herd another look, especially because it has the added benefit of avoiding angelo's scrutinizing eye. ]

Unfamiliar land, full of unfamiliar people...

[apodictic]

But it also means that their system is working. They can bring creatures elsewhere to populate this wasteland, provided we give them incentive to do so.

[ rather thoughtfully; ] What I want to know is whether it has limits.

race track.

[beye]

[It's too bright out here and Dimitri doesn't know where the fuck he is. All he knows is that he doesn't want to be here and there's little sense in watching food run around a race track.

See this spear that Dimitri won't loosen his hold on? He could throw it. He could throw it and secure dinner for them both, but he isn't in the habit of sharing meals with rats.]

Are you not here to be entertained? This is no dining hall, need you be reminded.

[He can see that pretty clearly with a single eye, Angelo. What's your excuse?]

[apodictic]

[ hmm. not intolerable. alright, this evening is going well. ]

Anywhere can be a dining hall if you're not picky.

There are plenty of horizontal surfaces that are serviceable for such an ordeal.

[ he looks at him in interest. in this case it just means angelo isn't frowning at him. ] Which corner of the world did they drag you from?

[beye]

[Birds are picky, Dimitri isn't. On that note, fuck silverware. His laughter, clipped and brief, is agreement enough. Dimitri would cast Angelo one of his sidelong gazes if he weren't on his eye patch side, so forget eye contact. Forget manners.]

Hell. [Wowie.] A dark, fetid hell, not entirely dissimilar from the likes of this backwater pit.

Are you not similarly displeased with your new "home"?

[His Edelgard senses are tingling, but a tingle isn't enough to so scrabbling away on all fours in pursuit of that creature.]

[apodictic]

Of course. But survival takes precedence over contemplation of things that should be and could be -- I have a lot of things to return to.

"Hell" is nothing. That means you belong nowhere. [ he has a stolen popcorn he's munching on. ] And you have no-one. Then again, I'm not the best with such stories.

[ he offers him aphro pop. popcorn, your rattiness? ]

[beye]

[God damn. Fuck the birds, Dimitri has half a mind to run this petulant thing through and leave him dangling from on high. Whatever it is he's eating, it's offensively loud.]

You know nothing of hell. Whatever stories you've concocted in your head pale in comparison to the real thing, and were I you, I would stay my tongue.

[Shut up and eat your popping corn, boy. Dimitri eyes it, digs his hand into the bag, and very nearly spills the majority of it. The taste isn't bad, but then Dimitri can't taste much of anything. That begs the question–]

What is this?

[apodictic]

[ angelo just ... raises an eyebrow. he supposes that when people go to hell they just lose semblance of reality and other normal things, like how to eat popcorn. then again, if he hasn't had it before .... ]

Popcorn. It's a snack. They usually offer them in these events because it's low cost and easy to make in large batches. It is usually sold in multiple flavours, but this world only offers it with butter and salt.

[ he is .... like a child, ]

[beye]

[You see a disheveled man in a fur cloak and plate armor and concern yourself with his lack of knowledge on popcorn, Angelo??? Please. Dimitri is clearly what happens when you leave something to mold in some dark corner of a room until it gains sentience and a bad attitude.]

What a waste of funds. This is hardly fit to be called a meal. Could you sustain yourself on "popcorn" alone? Perhaps so, given your figure, but then, I don't imagine you could last a minute on your own.

[Give him a platform and he'll go on and on. This is all your fault for sharing popcorn with the rat king, who obviously doesn't care for it, as he's pried it from Angelo's hands and crushed it.]

A child like you would wither away and rot in hell. Popcorn... don't make me laugh.

[thorniest]

[Honestly, Kainé could watch this all day. These chickens might be giant, but she couldn't see them as threatening; compared to her daily struggles against the shades, being menaced by chocobos seemed unthinkable. Like being strong-armed by an infant.

Not that she's going to leave Angelo to his fate or anything... but she maybe waits a bit longer to intervene than was totally necessary.

When she finally does take action, though, it's swift and decisive. She approaches - quietly, particularly considering her normal fondness for incoherent strings of curses - the first bird from behind, and, stooping down slightly, grabs the feathery beast by the legs, hugging them to her chest. Without giving it time to react, she throws herself backwards, arching her back as she does, and drives the chocobo's body into the ground hard enough to leave it stunned, and clearly uncertain as to what just happened.

The other birds, having seen their companion get suplexed by a leggy psychopath in stripperwear, panic, and flee with a great cacophony of "kweh"s.

Just another day at the metaphorical office.]

[apodictic]

Oh!

[ wow. what a display.

angelo moves closer to her -- she's clearly not injured, but that bird probably doesn't have a semblance or reality anymore. ]

That is impressive. [ he says it with wonder. ] Unnecessarily cruel, but nonetheless, very impressive.

[thorniest]

[Kainé snorts at that. Cruel? It was still alive, wasn't it?]

Flattery'll get you nowhere, pal.

[She'll stand up and dust herself off, though not without disturbing the poor, suplexed chocobo. It gives a pathetic 'wark'... which just earns it a glare from Kainé.]

Shut the fuck up, food. I'll be with you in a goddamn second!

[But enough about the soon-to-be-fried chicken; she turns back to Angelo, and gives him a fairly mild (considering the cursing of a moment earlier), appraising look.]

So? What's the word, little man? You gonna live?

[apodictic]

I will be.

[ women are so bizarre. angelo raises an eyebrow at the comment on flattery, because in his opinion people are allowed to have one moment's grace before it turns unbearable, but that's not important here.

a suplex, however, seems like a decent upgrade to his list of moves. he will mentally add it and note to one day perform it on someone deserving. or something. ]

Your name?

[thorniest]

[Kainé just nods; she might be a surly asshole, but saving people is in her blood. As funny as Angelo's little crisis had been, it was hard to tell how serious it might've been.

Up close, though, he looked rumpled, but no worse for wear.]

...Kainé.

[And, with that, she turns towards the Tennessee Walking Chicken once more, and starts shifting the feathers on its neck. Fortunately, it's still dazed enough not to resist...]

...you see a collar or tag on any of 'em? [...] Eating someone's pet could be a pain... even if it's a little asshole.

[...yeah, she was serious when she called it "food".</small]

race track

[ludicrous]

Who's to say that won't happen afterwards? [ Are you possibly going to eat that oversized chicken? He's been watching so far, if just to document the first sign of birds in this godforsaken place. ] Were you able to find your sacred ground, Angelo?

[ Lelouch may as well just bludgeon him over the head with a tone this crisp. ]

[apodictic]

-- have you seen the way people treat these birds?

[ because they act like they can be friends. disgusting. it smells like a barn here.

as for lelouch's question, angelo glares at him. ]

Watch it. My patience has its limits.

The answer to that is 'no', but it's better my Captain isn't here. [ a frustrated sigh. ] He has work to do.

[ludicrous]

[ That's just how stables smell. Unbridled sin, unlike these carefully bridled birds. Lelouch, in unabashed affirmation to Angelo's force of will, nods in his general direction. ]

It wasn't in jest. I imagine you'd much rather be at his side right now.

[ Much as Lelouch would love to be at his sister Nunnally's side rather than here, stranded from everything he knows and spectating a bunch of humungous chickens for sport. ]

What kind of work does your captain do?

wildcard

[sharpestsword]

[ If there's an unfamiliar mobile suit around, Julieta feels obliged to check it out. It doesn't seem to be of any faction she knows of. That could potentially be a problem. She'd like to find out as much as she can to avoid any surprises. They've had to deal with enough of that here already. From her mobile suit, she can look it over and record what the machine is equipped with and what it might be capable of. Though most of it she won't know unless she sees it in action. ]