TDM 007: ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? (Sorry, No Refunds)

[erkumods]

TDM 007: ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

00. Arrival This time, you come out of the water, the Nameless Island's own inherent energy drawing people in. It's like being suspended between realities and abruptly pushed from behind through a rift in dimensions. It may make you sick, or that might be the motion of the ocean, lifting you to the surface and carrying you to shore. Waterlogged and covered in sand, new arrivals will be greeted by robots who welcome them with towels and bracelet devices. The A5 card is already loaded up. Feel free to explore the Island, though there isn’t much to see. Most of the buildings are abandoned and in dire need of repair, and beyond the city lingers a thick fog that obscures much of the wilderness from view. Wander too far into this fog, and you will find yourself mysteriously looping back to where you began, your memories of what you were doing and how you got there erased. With that in mind, it may be wise to stake your claim on a rundown apartment, a tent on the beach, or a bed in the “comfortable” new barracks. Your inventory will be found a day later, wrapped up haphazardly and delivered to each person's makeshift home. ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● I. Entertainment District Old and new arrivals alike have likely been enjoying(?) the Island’s one day of sunshine per week - and so have the robots! The energy they are able to harness from the sun has increased their productivity exponentially, and a colorful multi-level entertainment district has sprung up to surround a few of the city’s familiar locations. Here you will find the forge, the clothing shop, the Full Moon(ty) Theater, as well as a freshly upgraded Ticket to Ride: an all-purpose arcade where tickets won from skeeball and Whack-a-Woody can be exchanged for sexy, colorful prizes! Admission is free, and the robots especially encourage islanders to check out the following arcade additions: Lurid Laser Tag: Slip into a full-body laser tag suit and arm yourself with a robot-provided laser gun before you go into this spooky and maze-like laser tag arena, which has been designed in the fashion of an abandoned, post-apocalyptic city overrun with creeping, squirming, and sometimes grabbing plants (which may look and feel very familiar to the earliest residents of the Nameless Island). Avoid these obstacles and try to spot the enemy before they spot you! The laser guns issued by the ‘bots have three graduated settings, chosen by the shooter, to alert you when you are hit: 1. vibration, 2. sweet caress, and 3. deep massage. Any part of your laser tag suit may activate, depending on where you are hit. Islanders may choose to play 1-on-1 with a friend, or can be randomly assigned to an opponent or team. VR Rooms: Pull on a shiny new headset and enjoy an immersive virtual reality experience like none other available on the Island thus far! The technology is still somewhat limited, however, in that the rooms can only replicate settings and environments from the current users’ memories. Whether you’re looking to train your battle skills on your old stomping grounds or simply want to share the experience of your favorite hometown noodle shop with a friend, these new VR rooms will literally open up new worlds of entertainment to you. VR Rooms can be enjoyed alone or in pairs, and they are fully private. GundamPods: A scaled-down version of the newly installed mobile suit simulation cockpits which can be accessed in the hangar at the outskirts of the city, these side-by-side pods allow users to recreate the experience of piloting any mobile suit that has been brought onto the island, in PVP format. Scant and form-fitting clothing is recommended for the most seamlessly realistic piloting experience, as this allows the technology to interface with your sensory system. Wear a bikini and you’ll feel it right down to the G’s! ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● II. Sexscape Room Looking for the latest opportunity to earn credits? Look no further! The robots are researching the problem-solving capabilities of organic lifeforms, and they are seeking the Islanders’ help. The offered reward is very generous, and the ‘bots say the time commitment is no more than two hours. No manual labor required! Participants will only be given a puzzle to solve within that time limit. Those who agree will be led to a spacious, if dark, room... but not alone. When the lights turn on, two volunteers find themselves trapped together in an escape room! Written clues lead participants through a series of steps to find the trick that will unlock the doors that hold them captive. However, what kind of room they find themselves in is entirely luck of the draw. Some rooms are perfectly normal, with almost absurdly easy puzzles to solve - a tip of a bookcase or a key hidden beneath a pillow might just be the ticket out. Others may be outrageously difficult, with clues taking the form of cryptic riddles and assigned tasks requiring partnership and teamwork to complete. What kind of tasks, you may ask? Well, for some rooms it’s fairly obvious what volunteers are expected to do in order to earn their escape. That riding crop says it all, does it not? Those who fail to solve the escape room within two hours will be released without incident, the promised credits loaded to their devices. Islanders who successfully escape the room will be additionally rewarded with a goody bag of cute and colorful BDSM gear! ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● III. Speed Dating at the Limp Noodle So many renovations have occurred thanks to the efforts of those on the Island and the robots have decided a grand opening of the new Limp Noodle Shop! This robot-run shop has three small tables and a long counter for serving customers. It caters to various noodle foods and soups from any world and their menu changes regularly, but Wednesday is All You Can Eat Ramen Day. Try the Special Spicy Fishcakes to get a free drink, but they might make your noodle anything but limp and you'll need some help to calm it down. Effects can last up to three hours. But that’s not all. To promote the grand opening of the Limp Noodle the robots have added more seating and opened up the week for Swap Meet Speed Dating. That’s right, speed dating. Anyone who takes part in the 10 minute rounds of looking for your next Auspicious Act partner will receive all-you-can-eat snacks. Couples who hit it off will receive a free meal at a small two-seat table in a more secluded area. Questions are provided on note cards with a fine print reminder: “Eye contact supports sexual intrigue, please maintain at all times.” ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● ● N A V I G A T I O N

Comments

[tangyuan]

[ But did he give them back, and why would one take fireworks just for the sake of it? Ming Yi's expression is flat and unimpressed, and he isn't sure he wants to know what ridiculous reason Shi Qingxuan had for "borrowing" fireworks.

It's uncanny how easily he's gone back into his usual mode, all fears and all pains tucked away until they come spilling out. The shadows from earlier are gone like they were never there.

It's another thing that pins itself in Ming Yi's mind, along with the more material information Shi Qingxuan is happy to divulge. ]

Are the phases of the moon also unchanging?

[ Without seasons or the moon to judge by, keeping track of time really only relies on one's own memory and perception. Not that one to five months is usually more than a moment in their existence.

Though, this is Shi Qingxuan. ]

[air_head]

With the sky cloudy for most of the month? How can you really tell? You tend to lose track after a while. [Or rather, lose interest. The sun does peek out from behind the clouds once a week, but it is no indication of the seasons changing, at all.

Their food arrives, slightly better than the street fare and noodles from before. He reaches for the beer before his dinner companion can protest.

Speaking of which.]

Ming-xiong This is practically a "date"! Isn't that intriguing?

[tangyuan]

[ So it's always this overcast. Ming Yi makes a noncommittal sound, tucking that information away. If it's always overcast, keeping track of the time that way would become more difficult.

The food being set down smells so good, Ming Yi's stomach knots. The noodles actually look well-prepared, evenly thin and smooth, and the chopped greens and shredded meat on top look fresher than the other pieces he had eaten earlier.

Ming Yi looks at it, then to Shi Qingxuan's beer, and then just back to Shi Qingxuan himself as he leans his head in his hand with an unimpressed look, his brows pinching in the center. ]

What's a date? [ The thought of eating feels impossible, but he takes his beer at least. The smell is sour and unpleasant, stinging his nose, but he still takes a sip. ] Aren't you always doing this?

[air_head]

[Despite having been patronized with the companionship of Ming Yi for several hundred years now, Shi Qingxuan fails to notice the tell-tale sign of food left untouched, by this particular heavenly official, no less. Perhaps it is his elation at seeing a familiar and most beloved face after all this time that's left him senseless to the minutiae of his behavior.]

Ah, an intimate engagement between two individuals to further their acquaintanceship. [he explains blithely, the beer already improving his progressively rising mood] And I don't always do this. I've only "been on a date" a few times here, so far.

[tangyuan]

[ Irrationally, Ming Yi feels a stab of jealousy directly to his gut. He had meant that eating and drinking in Shi Qingxuan's company wasn't anything special, but that explanation gives it an entirely different feeling. Of course Shi Qingxuan wouldn't stay alone for long.

He looks away as he drinks his beer. ]

It sounds like you've been settling in well, then.

[air_head]

Can you blame me? Heaven is nothing like this!

[He waves one chopstick enthusiastically, as it would drive the point home.]

Well, for one thing, this place is so much worse! Even so, the mortals here are nothing like what I have seen in our lands. It would be a pity not to get to know as many people as possible. It was rather lonesome at first, but there's no point in sitting around and feeling sorry for myself. Right?

[tangyuan]

[ Listening to Shi Qingxuan talk, some of Ming Yi's momentary tension fades away again. Or, his jealousy does, which is to say nothing of the rest. To say this place is worse is a massive understatement. "Nothing like this," "worse," and "lonesome" are all understatements.

And Shi Qingxuan is carrying on the same as ever, as if this is another visit to the mortal realm with new and interesting people. That's what his attitude says, at least, though Ming Yi doesn't believe it when he talks like that.

But what good would sitting around feeling sorry for himself do?

Not wallowing in self-pity is all this is.

Ming Yi makes a noncommittal noise. ]

So that's why you've been going on "dates."

[ Which is a response to...whichever part of Shi Qingxuan's comments. ]

[air_head]

[He shrugs haplessly, then finally reaching forward to take his first taste of their dinner, the noodles coiling tantalizingly around his chopsticks.]

The communication array is down, at least for me. It's not as if I could have kept up with the latest information from heavens, missions included. What else is there to do? Say, can you get anything through? I'm told not even the intertwined network--that's what the mortals here call their own arrays--works here! And none of the tomes and books available to us are any good. I have fallen to watching recorded performances by mortals from their own lands to pass the time, but there's only so much I can watch! Did you know their statues can actually move without any spiritual energy? I wouldn't have believed it from their recorded plays, but then I saw it in the flesh! Or rather in the stone, ahahaha. Not that they're made of stone, of course.

[The fact he has managed to get a bite in is an overwhelmingly amazing feat at this point.]

[tangyuan]

[ Shi Qingxuan's ability to talk so much is a feat all on its own.

Sadly, not one he's unused to as he sits there and drinks his beer. He's listening whether anything he's saying is useful or not.

Truthfully, all of this makes Shi Qingxuan sound crazy, and Ming Yi wonders if he's not just making this up as a joke. Since when did mortals have that kind of power and abilities? The heavens' spiritual communication array is difficult to maintain, and it's hard to believe a group of mortals would have the strength or ability to do it. Even recording their performances is outside what should be possible.

He doesn't want to think of what making statues (which aren't stone?) move without spiritual power would involve.

Ming Yi presses his fingers to his temple. ]

"Not stone"?

[ That's all he's choosing to focus on. As for the communication array: Of course it's inaccessible. And if their personal connection is still there, Ming Yi is sure Shi Qingxuan will let him know sooner than later.

Ming Yi finishes his beer, and conveniently there's already a second bottle waiting for him. ]

[air_head]

[To be completely honest, Shi Qingxuan has been all but ready to launch into the recorded and animated plays that mortals have been providing for years, it seems, with newfound enthusiasm. He is slightly less enthusiastic about the moving statues.]

It is a quaint sort of metal, stacked in joints with bolts. [he starts carefully, pulling forth what he has memorized at pains from repeated patient explanations in the past] They are powered by a potent force in their cores and their heads are mostly ornamental, even if most of them house a chamber--Ah, Ming-xiong!

[There is that light again that sets everything at ease, as if the previous weariness in Shi Qingxuan's voice from minutes ago has never existed. As if the world has been born anew just for him.]

I should take you to see one up close and in person. How about that?

[tangyuan]

[ That's a very dry but not very exact explanation. Ming Yi is trying to imagine what this looks like and how it works (a spiritual device as the core, probably).

Though Ming Yi would go along with whatever Shi Qingxuan suggested, admittedly, seeing the moving statue does sound interesting. His eyes widen a little, and- ]

Can you move it yourself?

[ Sorry, this is more appealing hearing about mortal performances (not that he wouldn't listen regardless). ]

[air_head]

[Shi Qingxuan is used to discerning the slightest nuance in his companion's expressions--mostly boredom or disinterest. To see him react visibly to something he's said is a treat in itself. It elicits a laugh and a feeling of accomplishment, as if he's assembled the might statue himself.]

It's as high as a mountain! Not five of me combined could command it, Why, would you give it a try?

[tangyuan]

[ Even though Shi Qingxuan just admitted to not being able to do it, hearing that it's as large as a mountain is interesting. Not that he hasn't seen a statue as large as a mountain before, but that was a special case. Who else would even make something like that?

And thus, Ming Yi is still interested, even if a little disappointed by that answer. ]

I have no reason to try.

[ He starts drinking his second beer. ]

How many people normally command it at a time?